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His father looks up thoughtfully and says, "I'll demonstrate. Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars. Then go ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you've learned."
The kid is puzzled, but asks his mother. "Mom, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Robert Redford?"
"Don't tell your father, but, yes, I would."
He then goes to his sister's room. "Sis, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Brad Pitt?"
She replies, "Omigod! Definitely!"
The kid goes back to his father. "Dad, I think I've figured it out. Potentially, we are sitting on $2 million bucks, but in reality, we're living with two sluts."
Tracy Smith - Men Are Kleenex
Once you turn 30, the box is empty.
Tags: Tracy Smith (12), sex (1269), money (852)
Posted: 11/01/01
Views: 2,240
Victoria Jackson - Suburbs
Nobody respects a suburbanite.
Tags: Victoria Jackson (8), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1269)
Posted: 08/15/00
Views: 0
Jimmy Pardo - Different Penises
Jimmy's nephew asks an inevitable question.
Tags: Jimmy Pardo (8), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1269)
Posted: 06/30/02
Views: 937
Jo Koy - Crying for Sex
You should be able to cry for anything.
Tags: Jo Koy (30), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1269)
Posted: 01/17/08
Views: 45,856
Wanda Sykes - Kids Are Worth It
Kids are great -- when they're someone else's.
Tags: Wanda Sykes (43), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (852)
Posted: 11/30/98
Views: 1,650
Adele Givens - Poetry
Adele reads a poem to Re-Re.
Tags: Adele Givens (6), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (852)
Posted: 05/26/02
Views: 690
A.J. Jamal - Growing Up Poor
You ever have a food stamp bounce?
Tags: A.J. Jamal (46), money (852), kids (828)
Posted: 07/28/93
Views: 1,600
Vargus Mason - Amber Alert
You never hear about someone kidnapping badass children.
Tags: Vargus Mason (3), money (852), kids (828)
Posted: 06/28/07
Views: 699
Robert Schimmel - Swim with the Dolphins
Do not stick anything in a dolphin's blowhole.
Tags: Robert Schimmel (5), money (852), kids (828)
Posted: 07/05/07
Views: 1,884
Dana Eagle - Immature Adult
For just $30 a day, you too can sponsor an immature adult.
Tags: Dana Eagle (2), money (852), kids (828)
Posted: 01/24/00
Views: 582
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