Jokes tagged with 'money' | Jokes.com | Comedy Central

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A crook mistakenly made a counterfeit $8 bill instead of a $10 bill. He decided to try it out anyway.

He went to the teller at the local bank and asked for change.

The teller looked at the $8 bill and gave the crook two $4 bills as change.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431) 
Q: What does one penny say to the other penny?

A: Let's get together and make some cents.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431) 
Q: What has six balls and rips you off daily?

A: The lottery.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431) 
Q: Two coins add up to 30 cents, and one is not a nickel. What are they?

A: A quarter and a nickel. The quarter isn't a nickel.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431) 
Q: Why did Florida orange growers offer O.J. Simpson $3 million?

A: To change his name to Apple Juice.
news & politics
money
Jokes Tagged: news & politics (622)money (431) 
I love you, wallet. I'm going to get you a Sears card tomorrow 'cause you're so good to me.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Brian Frazer (1) 
Q: What is the only way to keep your money from the casinos in Las Vegas?

A: When you get off the plane, walk into the propellers.
money
travel
Jokes Tagged: money (431)travel (277) 
Usually this is between me and my maker, but I'll share it with you -- 28% of what I'm earning tonight, I am giving to the United States government.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)David Feldman (24) 
Q: What do you call counterfeited German currency?

A: Question marks.
money
international affairs
Q: What's six inches long, two inches wide and thrills women?

A: Money.
men/women
money
Jokes Tagged: men/women (1725)money (431) 
I put on my favorite winter jacket for the first time the other day, and as soon as I put my hands in those pockets, I was immediately reminded that last year I didn't have any money, either.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Ben Bailey (11) 
I got in trouble with American Express. They said to start leaving home without it.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Jack Mayberry (3) 
Q: What has a bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?

A: A bingo machine.
money
aging
Jokes Tagged: money (431)aging (244) 
You ever feel like you get a little extra money, run into a few bonus bucks somewhere -- and then something happens right away to just suck it right out of your hands? Has it gotten to the point where you can't even take the anxiety of having...
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Tracy Smith (15) 
Listen, money fall out in front of me, they could come over to my house while I'm standing there in a leather Karl Kani suit, waxing a new Benz -- I don't know nothin' about it.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Sean Henderson (1) 
I went to an ATM today. Why would a homeless guy peddle for cash at the ATM? We're at the ATM 'cause we don't have any cash, and you're not getting a $20, bitch.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)John Caparulo (16) 
Tony and his friend John die in a car accident and go to judgment. God tells Tony that because he cheated on his income taxes, the only way he can enter Heaven is to sleep with a stupid, ugly woman for the next five years.

A few days later,...
money
death
Jokes Tagged: money (431)death (170) 
I like to stand near ATM machines, and when somebody types in their pin number, I go, 'Got it!' And then I run away.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Demetri Martin (43) 
They say money changes people, and I say hook that sh*t up. I'm about due for some alterations. I don't care if money changes me into a 300-pound chinchilla with herpes simplex two.
money
Jokes Tagged: money (431)Matt Fulchiron (1) 
A retired man moves near a junior high school. He spends the first few weeks of retirement in peace and quiet. However, when a new school year begins, three young boys beat on every trash can they encounter every day on their way home from...
kids
money
Jokes Tagged: kids (636)money (431)