Jokes tagged with 'lawyers' | Jokes.com | Comedy Central

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Your Search for "lawyers" found 114 results in Jokes

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Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Four: one to climb the ladder, one to hold the ladder, one to shake the ladder and one to sue the ladder company.

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What's the difference between a trampoline and a lawyer?
You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What do you call a lawyer who doesn't know the law?
A judge.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk and started a fight with the other two men. The police came and took the drunk guy to jail. The next day the man went before the judge. The judge asked the man, “Where do you...
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore the door off of the driver's side. The counselor immediately grabbed...
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What's the difference between F.Lee Bailey and a generalized joke about Lawyers?

One is boorish rude and insensitive, the other is just a joke!!

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
A snake and a lawyer both got hit by a car. What's the difference between em?

The snake had skid marks in front of him.

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Q. How many lawyer jokes are there?

A. Three...the rest are all true.

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Why do you need only two pallbearers at a lawyer's funeral?
There are only two handles on a garbage can.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?
When his lips are shut.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
95% of all lawyers give the rest a bad name!
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What Did A Lawyer Name His Daughter?

Sue!!

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
A doctor notices a sidewalk stand that says 'brains for sale.' He goes over to investigate and sees a sign that says 'Doctor brains $8.00 a pound’ and another sign that says ‘Paramedic brains $12.00 a pound, Nurses brains $30.00...
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a hooker?

A: A hooker will stop trying to screw you once you''re dead.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw a light bulb?
A: One but it has to have a good case.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What do you call one lawyer thrown off a bridge into a river?
Pollution.
What do you call all the lawyers thrown off a bridge?
Solution.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
What do you call an honest lawyer?

An oxymoron.

lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114) 
Do you know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers fighting over a penny.
lawyers
Jokes Tagged: lawyers (114)