Jokes tagged with 'kids' | Jokes.com | Comedy Central

Show: ALL (1525)  |  VIDEOS (889)  |  ? JOKES (636)

Your Search for "kids" found 636 results in Jokes

1-20 of 636 Results
Q: What did the blueberry say to the blueberry?

A: You're a blueberry.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Q: Why was the Egyptian boy confused?

A: His daddy was really a mummy.
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
A little kid goes to his first movie alone. He buys one ticket and goes in.

A minute later, he comes back out to buy another ticket. The man at the counter asks, "Why do you want another one?"

The kid replies, "Because that man over there ripped the first one in half."
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country:

1) My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

2) Please excuse Lisa...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
How many frat boys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One but he has to get it drunk first.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
A young schoolboy was having a hard time pronouncing the letter ''R,'' and all the other kids were, of course, teasing him about it. To help him out, the teacher gave him a sentence to practice at home: ''Robert gave Richard a rap in the ribs for...
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
What is green and yellow and lies in a pile of cookie crumbs?

A beat-up girl scout.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
A little boy runs across this farmer who has a truckload of cow manure. The boy asks him what he is going to do with all that cow poop. The farmer tells the little boy, ''I'm taking it home to put on my strawberries.''

The little boy looks up...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.

That was fine, but after they put...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
On Father's Day, a little boy decides to make his dad breakfast in bed. He makes scrambled eggs, toast and coffee. He brings it into his dad, hands him the cup of coffee and says,''Try it dad.''

The dad takes a sip and nearly passes out because...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing?

A: She had no arms.
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
One day a teacher told her students to draw a train on a railway track for homework. The next day when the teacher started checking everybody's book, she came up to Little Johnny. "Show me the homework," she demanded. Little Johnny showed the...
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile?

A: Get in the Batmobile Robin!

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
It is near the end of the school year.  The teacher has turned in the grades and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless because of this.

Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask first and correctly can leave...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side). While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and...
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
  1. Last night I got temporary amnesia and I totally forgot!
  2. My older sister couldn't find her same homework from last year.
  3. The dog did it for me, but it was in his language.
  4. The paper airplane I made out of it...
kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Jack and Jill went up the hill both with a dollar and a quarter.

Jill came back down with two fifty.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
A teacher was having a tasting day where she would put candy in the kids' mouth and they would guess what it was. She went to the first little boy and put a Hershey's Kiss in his mouth.

"Can you guess what it is?"

"I don't know," said the...

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Q: How can you find Dolly Parton's kids in a crowd?

A: They're the ones with the stretchmarks on their lips.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636) 
Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing.

A: She had no arms.

kids
Jokes Tagged: kids (636)