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As pothead walks down the road, a genie appears in front of him. "I'll grant you two wishes," says the genie.
The pothead replies, "I want a never ending joint."
The genie says, "As you wish," and gives him the joint.
The...
The pothead replies, "I want a never ending joint."
The genie says, "As you wish," and gives him the joint.
The...
Jokes Tagged:
drugs (178)
For years and years, Arj Barker was high on life, but eventually, I built up a tolerance.
The whole first week, I thought I was psychic. I thought I had new powers all of a sudden, you know. I'd be like, 'Where are my keys? Oh, they're in my pocket.' How did I know that? Oh my gosh!
Let me ask you this rhetorically -- which means don't answer me when I ask it: would crack be so bad, and would people think so harshly of crack, if it were called 'crackle'?
I don't have a joke about mushrooms, just some advice: do 'em -- seriously.
Hugs are great, but -- better than drugs? Come on. Let me put it to you this way: I never drove to Harlem at 4 a.m. to get somebody to hug me.
How many potheads does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, you all use candles.
How many potheads does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who cares? You're all stoned.
Cocaine is yucky. I did it once: I was at a party; I was bored. I was like, 'Alright, I'll do a line.' Then I was just bored longer.
I don't have much of a memory at all. No, I really don't. I think it's the drugs -- prescription and some under the counter, as well -- but, I mean, it's just gone. I'm really bad with names. I mean, I can meet someone, they tell me their name,...
By round of applause, how many people in here know somebody that smokes weed? I don't have a joke for that, I'm just trying to find a connection.
Let me just say -- drugs do not make you cool. It's the people that you do them with that make you cool.
For people that don't smoke pot, there's very little difference in behavior between when you're stoned and when you're not. Really there's only one difference: when you're stoned, you forget to say, 'Excuse me, I'm about to change the subject.'
A shipment of Viagra was hijacked on the way to the depot.
The police have warned the public to be on the lookout for a gang of hardened criminals.
The police have warned the public to be on the lookout for a gang of hardened criminals.
Q: What do you get when you mix Rogaine and Viagra?
A: Hair that stands straight up on your head.
A: Hair that stands straight up on your head.
Q: Why do the Dallas Cowboys now play on dirt?
A: Because Leon Lett smoked all the grass and sniffed all the lines.
A: Because Leon Lett smoked all the grass and sniffed all the lines.
Q: What do Disney World & Viagra have in common?
A: They both make you wait an hour for a two-minute ride.
A: They both make you wait an hour for a two-minute ride.
Q: What do you call the new mint-flavored birth control pills women can take before sex?
A: Pre-d**k-a-mints.
A: Pre-d**k-a-mints.
