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As soon as they get married, they all get these big old guts on them. That's not from drinking beer -- that's from swallowing pride.
Here's some advice for you guys: never hire a clown named Molesto.
I made the mistake of moving in with a hippie. Hippie roommate -- horrible mistake. Apparently, when they say 'peace and love,' what they really mean is 'filthy and annoying.'
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