Jokes tagged with 'Dwayne Perkins' | Jokes.com | Comedy Central

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Your Search for "Dwayne Perkins" found 17 results in Jokes

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I was like, 'Damn, do I look homeless?' But then I thought about it, and you know what? It could have been my first day of homelessness. You see, because on your first day of homelessness, you don't look that homeless. You don't stink yet, your...
housing
Jokes Tagged: housing (110)Dwayne Perkins (17) 
As long as you can still scare white people, you're not a sellout.
ethnic
Jokes Tagged: ethnic (427)Dwayne Perkins (17) 
I'm not frontin'. I'm trying to order the cheapest entree they had. If they had cardboard, I would have ordered that.
dating
money
food
I didn't even see the salmon on the menu because the salmon was on the section of the menu I wouldn't allow my eyes to look at. People, you know you get a menu, there's a whole page that's not your page.
money
food
The bill is clearly on my side of the table. It was as far as it could be on my side of the table without falling over. It was like she was playing table football, and she won.
dating
money
food
I don't drink; I'm a non-drinker. I told my friends I don't drink because alcoholism runs in my family. And you think my friends would respect that, but they don't. Every time we hang out, it's always the same thing. My friends are always like,...
family
friends
Ladies, you know how you have that guy friend, that guy friend that you like a lot, a whole lot, but not 'that way'? You have the friend, yeah? It's wrong. Because if the guy hangs out with you, you know he likes you. I mean, why else would he put up with your talking?
men/women
dating
friends
You grow up; you watch sports. They're all older than you. You're a little kid... You want to be like Mike. You want to be like Magic -- 'til around '90, '91 or so.
health
sports
growing up
These guys get paid millions to play a game, and we work. Well, I don't work, but I'm sure someone out there got a job.
sports
money
work/office
Everything we do, ladies, is for you, to try to get your attention: the cars, the money, the clothes, the brushing the teeth.
men/women
lookin' good
If you're gonna see a play about slavery, it's important that you watch it with your white friends because you know they're gonna pick up dinner that night.
ethnic
friends
history
For the white people, it would be like if you were going to Vermont.
insults
ethnic
travel
My friends from Brooklyn would call me at work, kind of militant. They'd want to talk about the man coming down on the brother man and the system. And I'm like, 'Hey, can I call you back later? I'm at the system.'
ethnic
work/office
friends
I didn't understand that. How could something get closer to zero forever? It didn't make sense to me until I got some credit card bills.
money
education
Ladies, when you have a guy friend, and he's a great guy, and you still won't date him -- do you know what that's like for the guy? It's like going on a job interview and having the guy say this to you: 'Well, Mr. Perkins, wow! This a great...
men/women
dating
work/office
friends
Go to L.A. -- they got gangbangers that will stab you, and then go to the corner and wait for the light to turn green.
travel
city
violence
laws
I got enough friends in my life: I got a mother, I got a sister, I got cousins I can't sleep with because of society.
men/women
dating
family
friends