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You're not gonna win, but that's all you're thinking about is winning, right? You don't even think about the fact that the game is impossible: you're 30 feet away, trying to throw a hot dog into a wine bottle.
I was opening a show for Huey Lewis once, right? We get to this venue; the last big act that was there before the Huey Lewis show was Clint Black. We get downstairs to the dressing room -- sure enough, on one of the dressing room doors there is a...
The interesting thing about our mix -- being that I'm black and she's Japanese -- people say, 'Y'all are gonna have some beautiful children.' I guess. It could be, or they could just have short legs and long arms.
I never talk to our cat, and our cat certainly never talks to me. So I don't know why my wife is compelled to put the cat on the phone when I call home, but I love my wife, so I will talk to the cat.
A friend of mine is 30 years old, and she's marrying a guy who's 19. I think it could work, yeah -- and if they're smart, they'll plan the wedding around the same time as the prom and rent the one tux.
You go to Las Vegas now, they've got penny slot machines. Yeah, penny slot machines. First of all, if you are gambling and you've gotta get change for a nickel -- it's over.
They put these one-time use cameras out on the tables. I thought that was a great idea -- 'til they got them pictures back, realized only them little bad kids had the cameras. They're going through hundreds of pictures like, 'Oh, here's another one of the cat's butt.'
I wasn't a bad kid, but I wasn't a good student, you know what I mean? My mind was just always elsewhere. Even at my high school graduation, I didn't even hear 'em calling my name 'cause I was too busy playing with the tassel on my hat.
I was tired, so I got me one of them energy drinks... They tell you they give you a boost, give you energy, right -- give you wings? Yeah, if you drink one of 'em. What they don't tell you: if you drink four of 'em, you're liable to be out on the hood of the car, naked.
I'd be the only dad keeping his kids home from school to teach me how to get to the next level on a video game.
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pop culture (770),
kids (630),
technology (345),
parenting (335),
Clinton Jackson (10)
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