Most Popular Tags Today
1-19 of 19 Results
I liked Amsterdam. I spent $2,000 window shopping.
Good Friday -- isn't that the day Jesus died? I don't think that was Good Friday for him. I don't see him up there going, 'Wooo! Party! Thank Dad, it's Friday!'
If Moses would have walked two more miles, we'd have all the oil.
I went to counseling, spent $5,000 to have two women call me a loser.
I come from a broken home. I don't blame my father for leaving 'cause I'm gonna move out soon myself.
Daddy, what's a pronoun?' 'I don't know, a noun that gets paid?' 'What's a synonym?' 'A bun.' 'What's a homonym?' 'A gay nym.'
People that put up Christmas decorations, all they're saying is 'Hey, we're not Jews.'
They make it across the border, they're in. They get caught at the border, they're shot. It's like high-stakes Red Rover.
Jokes Tagged:
news & politics (616),
international affairs (349),
violence (216),
America (72),
Rich Vos (19)
I hate pit bulls. They're not even dogs; they're weapons.
Divorce sucks. Let me tell you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out.
If I sent a body part to every girl that dumped me, I'd just be a finger.
The best relationship I ever had -- I used to go out with a homeless girl. Yeah, it was great 'cause after sex, I could just drop her off anywhere.
I got two daughters, and I was divorced when they were young. They were, like, four and two, and they took it tough because I told them it was their fault.
People that work behind the counters in hotels have to be the dumbest people on the planet. Those are the people White Castle said, 'Nah.'
My favorite is that 'Criminal Intent' with Vincent D'Onofrio. That guy knows everything. He could look at a footprint and go, 'She liked her eggs over medium.'
I went on match.com to meet a girl on a website. I'm reading all their profiles. Everyone says they like hiking; they all like hiking. How come whenever I date a girl, I can't get her to go to the kitchen to get me a drink, but on a date she wants to cross the Northwest Passage?
Do the world a favor and drink a bullet, stupid.
I'm telling you -- once you go white, you go right back to black.
My oldest daughter turned seven. I threw her birthday party at Off-Track Betting -- all the kids are crying; I'm going, 'Calm down, I'll pay you back.'
« Prev 1 Next »
