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I took on a summer job this year. I'm working down at the beach here, and I'm a lifeguard. Of course, I'm working on commission. 'Hey, you kids, go play in the riptide. Go on there. Daddy needs a new CD.'
My parents' 40th wedding anniversary last week. I talked to them. They're feeling old, but they also believe it's never too late in life to do the things you really want. So, this year they put me up for adoption.
Hustler Magazine is probably the worst magazine in the world. You ever look at that thing? It's awful. You just get the impression that their motto is, 'We don't spend a whole lot of money on good looking women, and we pass the savings along to you.'
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Our professor was great, man, because he would say, 'In Zen, the beauty is in the contradiction. You try by not trying. You succeed by not succeeding.' So, I took the final exam by not going. Of course, I failed by not passing, too.
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