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Ed Gein -- he's the guy that Hannibal Lecter was based on, 'Hannibal the Cannibal.' He made furniture out of people. Isn't that nice? 'Is that a Chippendale?' 'No, that's Bob Weinstein.'
I love Satan. Well, I don't love Satan; I respect him. He always wears black and silver, silver and black. Anybody who can accessorize in that kind of heat -- that's really terrific.
I just got out of the hospital. I had some surgery. I had my mother removed from my back.
I've been here eight months. I have been in two earthquakes, a race riot, floods and fires, and I left New York because I couldn't handle my mother.
Did you watch the Dahmer thing? We had it on TV. I thought that was real kind of nice TV. Did you watch it? His mother was there in the audience, every day, in court. What could she possibly say? 'It's a phase. Your Uncle Jack ate people until he was 17.'
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$27 million to find gays in the army -- $27 million? Walk up to a guy, go, 'Clang, clang, clang,' -- if he goes, 'Went the trolley,' you found him. Save the money.
He goes, 'I'm afraid of homosexuals.' And I keep thinking, 'What are you afraid of? What are you afraid they're gonna do -- sneak in and redecorate the place?'
Right after the earthquake, my mother calls me up. She goes, 'Why don't you move back home?' I said, 'Well, quite frankly, I'd rather die suddenly in an act of God than have you slowly peck me to death for 45 years.'
My sister -- kind of on the huge side -- she weighs about 300 pounds, she's about 4'11". It's a pretty picture. We buy her clothes in those specialty stores for the bigger gal, like Lane Bryant. Clothes come in three sizes: Jumbo, Husky, and Oh My God It's Moving Towards Us.
He's like the nicest man in the world. He could say something nice about anybody -- I mean, anybody. So finally one day I got fed up with it. I said, 'Alright, Dad, what about John Wayne Gacy? Killed 35 people, buried them under the house.' My father goes, 'Well, he's not lazy, and he's a home owner.'
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