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I've been a dad for awhile. I've noticed that certain things don't change about a child, no matter what stage of development they're in. When they're really small, just learning how to walk, you always have to tell them the same thing over and...
People always ask me that really romantic question: 'Do you remember the precise moment you proposed to your wife?' 'Oh yeah, right after I got the test results.'
I stop at a Burger King. I wasn't hungry; I just go in to harass the employees. I go and I address them by their first name. This confuses the hell out of them because they have forgotten they're wearing a name tag.
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