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I've let chicks think I'm another celebrity just to get laid, just to get any sex. I wish I had a dime for every time in the '90s a chick left New York City thinking she f**ked Newman from 'Seinfeld.'
I've never been swimming, and that's because it's never been more than half an hour since I last ate.
Crystal meth's a good drug if you need to walk to St. Louis one weekend.
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