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Q: Why doesn't a woman need a car?
A: Because you don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen.
A: Because you don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen.
-- You wake up on pavement.
-- You can't find the clothes you wore home from the party.
-- Your twin forgets your birthday.
-- You wake up to discover your waterbed broke, and then remember you don't have a waterbed.
-- You wake up...
-- You can't find the clothes you wore home from the party.
-- Your twin forgets your birthday.
-- You wake up to discover your waterbed broke, and then remember you don't have a waterbed.
-- You wake up...
A woman gives birth to a baby, and afterward, the doctor comes into her room and says, "I have something to tell you about your child."
The woman worriedly asks, "What's wrong with it?"
The doctor says, "There's nothing really wrong...
The woman worriedly asks, "What's wrong with it?"
The doctor says, "There's nothing really wrong...
Q: Which is harder to make: a blonde, a brunette or a redheaded snowman?
A: A blonde, because you have to hollow out its head.
A: A blonde, because you have to hollow out its head.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, if you put your ear to her butt, you can hear the ocean.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she walked into a house of mirrors and had 700 years of bad luck.
Q: Why is it so hard to teach blondes to water ski?
A: Because when they get wet, they roll over on their backs.
A: Because when they get wet, they roll over on their backs.
Fred, Bob and Mike visit a whorehouse.
Fred comes out of the first bedroom and says, "She put a powdered donut on my d**k."
Bob comes out of the second bedroom and says, "She put a glazed donut on my d**k."
Mike comes out of...
Fred comes out of the first bedroom and says, "She put a powdered donut on my d**k."
Bob comes out of the second bedroom and says, "She put a glazed donut on my d**k."
Mike comes out of...
Yo' Mama is like an elevator, you push the right button and she goes right down.
Q: How did the blonde put out her cigarette?
A: She threw it in the water and stepped on it.
A: She threw it in the water and stepped on it.
Q: What is the difference between Bill O'Reilly and the Hindenburg?
A: One is a flaming gasbag full of hot air, and the other is a dirigible.
A: One is a flaming gasbag full of hot air, and the other is a dirigible.
Q: How can you tell if the drummer's platform is level?
A: Drool is coming out of both sides of his mouth.
A: Drool is coming out of both sides of his mouth.
A little kid gets on a city bus, sits right behind the driver, and starts talking loudly, "If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow, I'd be a little bull."
The driver gets annoyed as the kids continues to yammer on. "If my dad was an rooster...
The driver gets annoyed as the kids continues to yammer on. "If my dad was an rooster...
Yo' Mama is so lazy, she stuck her nose out the window and let the wind blow it.
