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- Jimmy Dore
- In 1995, Jimmy moved to Los Angeles to get on television and it actually worked. He has appeared on every major network multiple times. The high point of Jimmy's stand-up career came when he taped his own 1/2 hour Comedy Special for Comedy...Read on
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What kind of tattoo would a librarian get? 'Books kick ass'? 'Shut the f**k up and read'?
- Jimmy Dore - Graduating Early(1:58)
- Jimmy Dore
- Who is advising kids to graduate faster than they need to?
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), work/office (398), college (164), Jimmy Dore (17)
- Jimmy Dore - Credit Card Declined(1:00)
- Jimmy Dore
- The adult equivalent of dorky clothes is getting your credit card declined.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865), Jimmy Dore (17)
I work a lot in Wisconsin because, let's face it, I have a great agent.
They didn't like me because I told them I was never in a frat, and I could have been if I had just held that egg in my ass eight seconds longer.
You don't get a prize if you finish college first. You know what you get -- a job and a boss. You friggin' lose.
I come from a big family, 12 kids in my family. Whenever I tell that to people, they go, 'Wow, 12 kids, what was that like?' Uh, horrible -- a lot of people, not a lot of food.
They go, 'Well, you learn a lot about life growing up in a big family, don't you?' Yeah, I learned that I'm replaceable.
The female ass needs no dressing up. If I'm back there, I'm happy.
My parents were Catholic. They were really Catholic -- like they almost molested somebody.
If we're gonna murder murderers, why don't we rape rapists? Sounds good on paper, but there'd be a short line for that job.
I went to Catholic school for 12 years. People always go, 'Jimmy, you went to Catholic school for 12 years, how come you're not a Catholic?' I say, 'Because -- I went to Catholic school for 12 years.'
I saw this lady being interviewed. She was a spokesman for a casino, and the guy tried to corner her. He said, 'Don't you think it's horrible the way you trick people into thinking they can win money when the odds are really stacked against them?'...
- Jim Gaffigan - Hot Pocket Revenge(4:04)
- Jim Gaffigan
- Jim meets a really big fan of his "Hot Pockets" bit.
- Videos Tagged: food (804), Jim Gaffigan (34), Jimmy Dore (17), Todd Glass (16), King Baby (14)
- Jimmy Dore - Deer Whistles(1:49)
- Jimmy Dore
- If deer have such sensitive hearing, why don't they get out of the ways of beeping cars?
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), animals (791), driving (296), Jimmy Dore (17), Wisconsin (16)
- Jimmy Dore - Tattoos(1:20)
- Jimmy Dore
- Certainly the danger is gone once librarians are sporting tattoos.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), books (748), fashion (230), trends (27), Jimmy Dore (17)
- Jimmy Dore - Capital Punishment(1:06)
- Jimmy Dore
- If laws were all an eye-for-an-eye, there'd be pretty reluctant guilty verdicts in rape cases.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), crime (415), violence (304), laws (172), Jimmy Dore (17)
- Jim Gaffigan - Life on the Edge(2:14)
- Jim Gaffigan
- Jim thinks of the most edgy thing there is -- and then he just attacks it.
- Videos Tagged: Jim Gaffigan (34), Jimmy Dore (17), Todd Glass (16), King Baby (14), Sarah Silverman (2)
They would hit us for discipline because we grew up really poor. I don't know if you know this, but poor people beat the sh*t out of each other.
She would go, 'All they do is talk about sex in your music -- sex, sex sex. There's a lot more to life than sex, Jimmy. Some day you're gonna find that out.' Mom, you had 12 kids, maybe you're not the person to talk.
