Most Popular Tags Today
- Dan Naturman
- Dan Naturman began performing stand-up comedy several years ago in, believe it or not, law school. By the time graduation rolled around Dan decided to devote himself to performing full time. Comedy, he discovered, was his true calling. Besides,...Read on
1-20 of 28 Results
Here's an example of something you never say at a job interview: 'Can I have my resume back? It's my only copy.'
You want a bar where you can get some action? OK, you go to the end of the block, and you turn gay.
- Dan Naturman - Gay Men Have More Sex(1:05)
- Dan Naturman
- Dan Naturman's butt is exit-only.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1283), gay/homosexual (633), Dan Naturman (12)
- Dan Naturman - Doctors(1:52)
- Dan Naturman
- Doctors don't do anything except send you to other doctors and then send you bills.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), health (976), drugs (639), Dan Naturman (12)
You New York chicks are high-maintenance... I'm not saying you're not worth it, I'm saying I ain't got it.
Nothing says 'Friday night at home alone' like a calculator watch. 'How long has it been since I've gotten laid? Let me calculate.'
You spend like a $100 grand in tuition, and you think you're done with them. Then for the rest of your life, they're calling up asking for money. No one else does that. If I see a movie, I don't get a call from the theater, like, 'We're buying a...
He's certainly not your average child molester... mostly because when you get to Michael's house, there really are rides.
Do you ever go to a movie, and your friend goes to the bathroom and comes back and says, 'What did I miss?' That's annoying. I'll be like, 'What did you miss? Nothing. There was a commercial. Now sit down and shut up.'
My phone rings -- my home phone -- and I don't answer it. Half a second later, my cell phone goes off. It's like, what part of 'I'm masturbating' don't you get?
When you're a doctor, you can introduce yourself to people and say, 'Hi, I'm Doctor Whatever-Your-Name-Is.' In other words, you can tell everybody what your credentials are up front, and it's not considered bragging. But nobody else can do that --...
Last night, I had sex with my old girlfriend -- not my ex-girlfriend, mind you, my old girlfriend. She's 72, 73, something like that.
Sometimes I wonder, what would I get for my last meal? Probably Mexican food because it's my favorite food. It makes you a little gassy, but so what, you're going down in an hour -- not a big deal. And then, they'll be like, 'Any last words?'...
- Dan Naturman - High-Maintenance Girls(2:33)
- Dan Naturman
- High-maintenance girls are worth it -- if you've got it.
- Videos Tagged: Comedy Central Presents (1821), dating (656), New York City (602), porn (110), Dan Naturman (12)
Last time I was on JetBlue, there was a dude next to me who looked a little suspicious. I was nervous. He was watching a movie, though; so I'm thinking, 'Would a hijacker watch a movie?' Probably not, right?... But you know it's a good movie if...
I've never understood the concept of the gift certificate because for the same $50 bucks, [my friend] could've gotten me $50 bucks.
A nice car is attractive to a lot of women. I've found with a '96 Geo, you're not getting the top-quality booty.
If you're in a Mexican prison, you're gonna hit the books, learn some Spanish -- because shower-time is coming up, and you're gonna want to learn a few phrases, like 'Don't put that in there, please.'
- Dan Naturman - Computer Skills(1:13)
- Dan Naturman
- In most jobs, you've got to be computer literate.
- Videos Tagged: sex (1283), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398), technology (348), college (164), Dan Naturman (12)
- Dan Naturman - Death Penalty(1:11)
- Dan Naturman
- At least with the death penalty you get a last meal.
- Videos Tagged: sex (1283), food (804), Premium Blend (750), crime (415), prison (100), death penalty (21), Dan Naturman (12)
