Originally from Anchorage, Alaska, Dan has performed standup on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and Comedy Central Presents Dan Mintz. He has written for Andy Milonakis, Human Giant, and HBO's Lucky Louie.Read on
I took this girl to dinner, and I heard that women like it when you order for them, so I was like, 'I'll have the special, and she's not getting anything tonight.'
When I was eight years old, I had to do a science project, but my dad just did it for me. I didn't contribute at all. I think the teacher kind of figured it out when the project was called, 'Is My Wife Cheating on Me?'
My parents are getting old and sick. I think I might have to put them in a nursing home. I feel really bad, though, because I live with my parents and I don't want to live in a nursing home.
My grandfather was actually a Holocaust survivor, and you can tell that it really affected him because to this day, he still will not walk into a gas chamber.