Everything About 'Kyle Cease' | Jokes.com | Comedy Central

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  • Posted: 05/11/2006
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  • Posted: 05/11/2006
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I feel like, as we get older, we should have recess. Now that we have, like, wars and Visa bills, we should have 15 minutes on the slide everyday.
money
growing up
The best part of Nintendo were the codes. We had codes that got us to the end of the game immediately. Why can't we have that in real life? Just once I'd like to be on a date with a chick, when she starts talking about her cats and she's like,...
men/women
pop culture
dating
technology
I like how beer companies always advertise how cold their beer is. Wouldn't that be up to us? Like, 'When you want a beer that's really cold...' -- I'm like, 'Yeah, if I put it in the fridge, a**holes. It's my decision, not you.'
business
They always put the colleges in the middle of nowhere, and they always tell these kids, 'Hey, don't drink, don't do drugs, and don't have sex.' And they make it so they have to. It's like, your choices are Wal-Mart or Susie -- hmmm, both are always open....
sex
college
People don't know for sure if they can believe a lot of the things in the Bible. Like, people don't know for sure if God and Virgin Mary made baby Jesus. And the reason a lot of people don't know that for sure is we didn't have Maury Povich back...
pop culture
religion
parenting
Why are we allowed to put our friends down as a reference? They'll always have your back. You should have to put your enemies down. That'd be such a better phone call, wouldn't it? 'Hey, do you think Kyle would be a good guy to hire?' 'Yeah, if you want him to f**k your wife.'
work/office
friends
You ever go into a restaurant -- whether you want a Coke or a Pepsi, they always have the other one?
food
Jokes Tagged: food (387)Kyle Cease (14) 
Sunny D tasted a little bit like a fat clown's a**hole. I don't know if you've tasted it. Who came up with Sunny D and was happy? Some guy was like, 'I like the taste of orange juice and baby medicine. Can we combine that?'
insults
food
clowns