Work/Office Jokes
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Prison vs. Work
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-- In prison, you get three meals a day. At work, you get 30 minutes for a meal you buy or bring yourself.
--In prison, you get time off for good behavior. At work, good behavior is rewarded with more work.
-- In prison, they allow your family and friends to visit. At work, even personal calls are disallowed.
-- In prison, all expenses are paid by taxpayers. At work, you are the taxpayer.
-- In prison, everyone knows when you drop the soap. At work, everyone knows when you drop the ball.
--In prison, you spend most of your time waiting to get out from behind bars. At work, you spend most of your time waiting to go into the bars.
--In prison, there are sadistic wardens. At work, there are managers.
-- In prison, you can get shivved. At work, you get shafted.
Jim Gaffigan - Cake
Pie is like liquid cake.
Tags: Jim Gaffigan (34), work/office (398),
Posted: 12/01/07
Views: 125,310
Ryan Stout - Laughter
Ryan likes to hear a laugh that comes from human empathy.
Tags: Ryan Stout (4), imitations (772), work/office (398)
Posted: 05/24/07
Views: 1,181
Mike DeNicola - Midgets
Ever see a midget run a three-legged race?
Tags: Mike DeNicola (1), work/office (398), Shorties Watchin' Shorties (149)
Posted: 12/15/04
Views: 1,053
Stand-Up: Pete Lee - Passive-Aggressive Mascot
Pete is a mascot.
Tags: Pete Lee (7), Comedy Central Presents (1821), family (667)
Posted: 02/13/09
Views: 2,294
Eddie Gossling - Quitting
If you get fired, especially from a bad job, you should go off.
Tags: Eddie Gossling (11), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398)
Posted: 10/04/01
Views: 716
Jamie Kennedy - Smoking Pot
Smoke pot -- get paid.
Tags: Jamie Kennedy (14), Premium Blend (750), drugs (639)
Posted: 03/03/05
Views: 4,840
Rodney Laney - Good Job
A one word job might be a good job.
Tags: Rodney Laney (3), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398)
Posted: 12/09/04
Views: 835
Happy Hour Survival Guide - Martha Kelly: Back to Work
Nearly drowning is one way to prepare for a new job.
Tags: Martha Kelly (3), Premium Blend (750), work/office (398)
Posted: 12/13/02
Views: 1,291
Christian Finnegan - Interview
CCP: Christian Finnegan
Tags: Christian Finnegan (28), work/office (398), toys & games (69)
Posted: 03/10/05
Views: 13,733
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