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9. Your friends call to ask how you've been, and you immediately scream, 'Get off my back, bitch!'
8. Your garbage can IS your 'in' box.
7. You wake up to discover your bed is on fire, but go back to sleep because you just don't care.
6. You have so much on your mind, you've forgotten how to pee.
5. Visions of the upcoming weekend help you make it through Monday.
4. You sleep more at work than at home.
3. You leave for a party and instinctively bring your ID badge.
2. You blasted your Daily Planner with a .357 Magnum a week ago, but still haven't been able to miss a meeting.
1. You think about how relaxing it would be if you were in jail right now.
John Heffron - Second Business
John's wife has him on call 24/7.
Tags: John Heffron (24), Comedy Central Presents (1821), marriage (581)
Posted: 01/11/07
Views: 4,768
Mark Pitta - Cool Whip
How busy could the Cool Whip hotline get?
Tags: Mark Pitta (5), food (804), imitations (772)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 1,465
Jackie Kashian - Salesman Father
It would drive Jackie's father nuts when she had to sell stuff for school.
Tags: Jackie Kashian (11), Comedy Central Presents (1821), kids (841)
Posted: 02/27/03
Views: 639
Charlie Viracola - Cable Strippers
Cable companies don't have the courtesy to come at a specific time.
Tags: Charlie Viracola (10), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865)
Posted: 05/15/03
Views: 832
Gregg Rogell - Cell Phones
Gregg Rogell's new plan lets him use his cell phone Mondays between five and seven in the morning.
Tags: Gregg Rogell (13), Comedy Central Presents (1821), terrorism (439)
Posted: 07/31/03
Views: 2,387
Dan Naturman - Job Interviews
The hardest part about the corporate world is the interview.
Tags: Dan Naturman (12), Comedy Central Presents (1821), work/office (398)
Posted: 04/14/05
Views: 1,096
Arj Barker - Wells Fargo
Citibank does not know how to spell "city."
Tags: Arj Barker (21), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865)
Posted: 03/30/06
Views: 3,440
Mike Birbiglia - Fat Tuesdays
Fat Tuesdays is not a comedy club.
Tags: Mike Birbiglia (39), Comedy Central Presents (1821), work/office (398)
Posted: 02/07/08
Views: 16,411
Andy Borowitz - Faster Food
How much faster can fast food get?
Tags: Andy Borowitz (2), food (804), observational (334)
Posted: 08/03/06
Views: 662
Ryan Hamilton - Inflatable Dancing Man
Car dealerships give away free hot dogs like it's no big deal.
Tags: Ryan Hamilton (3), imitations (772), Live at Gotham (332)
Posted: 06/28/07
Views: 2,130
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