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Clinton Bedtime Story
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Bill groggily opens his eyes and says, "Honey, it's 3am. What do you want?"
"I have to go use the bathroom," Hillary replies.
Bill blinks. "Please tell me you didn't wake me up just to tell me you have to go to the bathroom."
"No," Hillary says, "I just wanted to tell you to save my spot."
Judy's stand-up at a pro-choice benefit was intentionally offensive.
Jack feels sorry for Monica Lewinsky.
America should punish the state that gave us Bill Clinton.
Wanda Sykes calls Clinton an idiot.
It seems like Bill Clinton is getting sued by women everywhere.
Whipping out your penis is a bold pick-up strategy.
Hugh Fink imagines John Gotti's statement in court.
Bill Clinton asks Rick and his wife on a double date.
A vote for Ross Perot is a vote to buy Japan.
Every president has had extra-marital affairs.
How did Bill Clinton practice safe sex?
He didn't light
the cigar.
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Q: What's the similarity between Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine?
A. They both say, "Insert Bill here."
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Bill Clinton was recently seen smoking a pipe. When asked why
he wasn't smoking a cigar he said, ''Cigars are for pussies."
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Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson are taking a post-workout
shower. Bill looks down and says, ''Jesse, how'd you get that huge pecker?!'' Jesse...
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Most wives whose husbands fool around have to worry about their husbands getting AIDS from sex.
Hillary just has to worry about her husband...
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My new computer's the Bill Clinton Model. It's gotta 2 inch
hard drive, no memory and it keeps going down.
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Monica's Diary
Entry 1
Dear
Diary,
One day Bill Clinton decides to go on a jog. While jogging he
sees a hooker on the street corner and she says Five bucks for a blowjob....
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What will Bill Clinton always be remembered for as history goes on?
He's after Bush.
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I performed at a Democratic fundraiser in Miami Beach about two
and a half years ago, and I performed for Bill Clinton. I did stand-up comedy for...
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