Shave and a Hair Cut | sex | Jokes.com

This Site
The Web
jokes.com home Jokes.com - Stand-up Comedy's official site
jokes.com comedians Stand-up Comedians
jokes.com jokes Funny jokes, blonde jokes, joke of the day, Yo Mama jokes, and more
jokes.com videos The funniest stand-up video archive on the web
Upload your stand-up to the Jokes.com Open Mic Challenge
Sex Jokes
Shave and a Hair Cut
 Get another Sex Joke »
sex
A man is away on business, at a convention for marvellous machines. He found a long corridor lined with machines and decided to try a few. The first he came to was called ''The Wonder Cut''. He inserted his money and did as he was told to do by the instructions. He lay back in the chair and after a few minutes the machine stopped and he hopped out of the chair, with the best hair cut he had ever had.

Further down the corridor he came to a machine that said, 'For the best shave every insert here'', so he inserted his money in and place his face in the slot. And sure enough his face had the best shave he had ever had.

He walked on down the corridor until he came to the last machine. It said ''for the man who has been away from his wife for a long time and is in dire need.. The rest of the words were rubbed of but he got the general idea. He made sure no one was looking and inserted his money, undid his fly and placed his ''thing'' in the hole. The machine rumbled and after a few minutes of extreme pain he withdrew his thing from the hole with a new shiny button neatly sewed on the end.
More Sex Jokes »
Filed Under: sex (2379)
Share This Joke: 
Add To: 

Posted: 10/30/08

Drew Hastings - Young Girlfriend

Having a young girlfriend sucks.

Tags: Drew Hastings (8), sex (1283),

Posted: 01/03/03
Views: 8,131

Drew Hastings - Erectile Dysfunction

My penis was so shiny I could do my hair in it.

Tags: Drew Hastings (8), sex (1283), mental health (221)

Posted: 01/03/03
Views: 3,794

Gabriel Iglesias - Kids Discovering Late Night TV

Gabriel Iglesias talks about the first time he got a chance to watch late night cable.

Tags: Gabriel Iglesias (23), sex (1283), impressions (304)

Posted: 10/12/09
Views: 91,388

Greg Giraldo - DVD Exclusive - Marsupial Sex

Given the choice of kangaroo sex and koala sex, you'd probably be wise to go with the koala sex.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (41), sex (1283), animals (791)

Posted: 10/14/09
Views: 1,075

Rodney Carrington - Hand Sex

He watches a lot of porno. Well, three minutes of it.

Tags: Rodney Carrington (4), sex (1283),

Posted: 04/16/07
Views: 157,785

Highlight - Dave Attell - Kardashians

Dave Attell on the Kardashians

Tags: Dave Attell (61), sex (1283),

Posted: 11/14/07
Views: 16,780

TJ Miller - Sixty-Nine

Why 69 when you can 96?

Tags: TJ Miller (8), sex (1283), Live at Gotham (332)

Posted: 07/11/08
Views: 1,609

DVD - Exclusive Patton Oswalt - The Year 2009

If you went back in time to 1999, the ten-years-ago you would not believe how cool things are today.

Tags: Patton Oswalt (33), sex (1283), music (727)

Posted: 07/06/09
Views: 22,624

Larry the Cable Guy - Class Reunion

Larry's brand new CD 'Tailgate Party,' filmed live in front of 53,000 people, is in stores now.

Tags: Larry the Cable Guy (35), sex (1283), family (667)

Posted: 09/21/06
Views: 14,050

 
Stand-up comedian Dane Cook on Comedy Centrals Jokes.com
Looking for something else?