Rusty Ward: Cremation | Rusty Ward | Jokes.com

Rusty Ward Jokes
Rusty Ward: Cremation
Get another Rusty Ward Joke »
I'm thinking, when I finally go, when my time is up, I'd like to be cremated. Most people when they're cremated, they want their ashes to be released over the ocean or maybe the grave of a loved one. I'd like to be sprinkled over the food of someone I don't like. I think it'd be the ultimate way to say, 'Eat me.'
Filed Under: gross-out (685),  death (170),  Rusty Ward (2)
Share This Joke: 
Add To: 
Posted: 01/22/04

Rusty Ward - Food Obsession

Vegetarians don't enjoy their food as much as meat eaters.

Tags: Rusty Ward (1), Premium Blend (749), food (550)

Posted: 01/22/04
Views: 238

Stephen Lynch - A Love Song

If loving a corpse is a sin, Stephen will see you in hell.

Tags: Stephen Lynch (32), men/women (919), Premium Blend (749)

Posted: 12/12/97
Views: 12,642

Nick Swardson - Alcohol Poisoning

Alcohol poisoning isn't fun, but trying to explain what happened to someone else is.

Tags: Nick Swardson (35), alcohol (396), observational (335)

Posted: 10/12/09
Views: 23,987

Bill Engvall - Fifties

The older you get, the more people think they have to listen to you.

Tags: Bill Engvall (12), men/women (919), money (470)

Posted: 11/22/09
Views: 26,000

DVD Exclusive - Patton Oswalt - Jet Blue

Jet Blue understands how horrible air travel is, so they shove distractions down your throat.

Tags: Patton Oswalt (33), storyteller (264), death (212)

Posted: 07/06/09
Views: 24,552

Larry the Cable Guy - Class Reunion

Larry's brand new CD 'Tailgate Party,' filmed live in front of 53,000 people, is in stores now.

Tags: Larry the Cable Guy (32), sex (983), family (581)

Posted: 09/21/06
Views: 22,650

Greg Giraldo - DVD Exclusive - Handicapped

Having a debilitating accident while staying in a handicapped room isn't that bad of a situation.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (38), storyteller (264), dark (84)

Posted: 10/14/09
Views: 2,205

Janeane Garofalo - Hell

Hell is being sentenced to the StairMaster.

Tags: Janeane Garofalo (9), death (212), Shorties Watchin' Shorties (148)

Posted: 05/25/04
Views: 3,500

Roy Wood Jr. - Sucking at Relationships

Roy Wood Jr. sucks at relationships.

Tags: Premium Blend (749), dating (637)

Posted: 11/10/05
Views: 1,476

Kenny Rogerson - Back From the Dead

Those "back from the dead" stories are all the same.

Tags: Kenny Rogerson (4), The A-List (486), death (212)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 540

 
Stand-up Showdown on ComedyCentrals Jokes.com
Looking for something else?