Paul F. Tompkins Jokes
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Paul F. Tompkins: Gag Peanut Brittle
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I was in a novelty
store the other day, because I am a fan of hilarity, and saw that they are still making the gag peanut brittle. You know what I'm talking about? You open the can of peanut brittle up and snakes fly out! And the time to really get someone with this, I think, was the mid-1800s -- you know, before entertainment was invented and that was the best they had.
Paul F. Tompkins - Theme Parks
Theme parks are a great way to get rid of money fast.
Tags: Paul F. Tompkins (22), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865)
Posted: 03/15/07
Views: 4,562
Sabrina Matthews - Groceries
Ice cream and tampons usually go together.
Tags: Sabrina Matthews (9), Comedy Central Presents (1821), food (804)
Posted: 01/21/01
Views: 1,052
Tracy Smith - Free Money
Money and shopping can cause a lot of anxiety.
Tags: Tracy Smith (12), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865)
Posted: 08/21/03
Views: 492
Lizz Winstead - Fashion Nightmare
Fashion is enough of a nightmare as it is without people bringing bellbottoms back.
Tags: Lizz Winstead (14), parents (525), lookin' good (369)
Posted: 05/25/93
Views: 193
D.C. Curry - Child Pressure
You don't owe your kids a damn thing.
Tags: Comedy Central Presents (1821), kids (841)
Posted: 08/24/00
Views: 1,903
Paul F. Tompkins - I'm Rich
Working in show business brings in a lot of money.
Tags: Paul F. Tompkins (22), Comedy Central Presents (1821), money (865)
Posted: 03/13/02
Views: 2,454
Paul F. Tompkins - Balloon Shopping
Elegant Balloons is the best place to buy balloons.
Tags: Paul F. Tompkins (22), Comedy Central Presents (1821), observational (334)
Posted: 03/13/02
Views: 4,519
Paul F. Tompkins - Jazz is Lousy
The only purpose jazz serves is making people feel stupid.
Tags: Paul F. Tompkins (22), Comedy Central Presents (1821), music (727)
Posted: 03/13/02
Views: 2,253
Paul F. Tompkins - Crackle
Crack wouldn't be a problem if it was called "crackle."
Tags: Paul F. Tompkins (22), Comedy Central Presents (1821), drugs (639)
Posted: 03/13/02
Views: 3,058
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