Things Men Don't Say | men/women | Jokes.com

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Things Men Don't Say
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-- Let's watch Lifetime.

-- Sex
is overrated.

-- I don't want to go too far on the first date.

-- Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you.

-- Don't we owe your mother a visit?

-- I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down.

-- Dessert goes right to my hips.

-- I hate when I miss Oprah.

-- Does this suit make me look fat?

-- I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
Filed Under: sex (2379),  men/women (1718),  pop culture (770)
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Posted: 12/01/08

Jimmy Aleck - It's a Guy Thing

There are things men do you'll never see women do.

Tags: Jimmy Aleck (3), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 1,456

David Alan Grier - People Will Always Have Sex

Even if sex means death, people will still do it.

Tags: David Alan Grier (43), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 04/24/03
Views: 27

David Alan Grier - People Will Always Have Sex

Even if sex means death, people will still do it.

Tags: David Alan Grier (43), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 04/24/03
Views: 941

Tracy Smith - Last Woman on Earth

Tracy's high heels are proof that she doesn't hate men.

Tags: Tracy Smith (12), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1283)

Posted: 08/21/03
Views: 1,282

Vanessa Hollingshead - Lowering Expectations

Vanessa's glad if she meets a guy with ears.

Tags: Vanessa Hollingshead (9), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 09/04/98
Views: 1,753

Richard Lewis - Someone Who Doesn't Love You

You know she doesn't want you when she wears repellent and turtleneck lingerie.

Tags: Richard Lewis (69), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 354

Doug Benson - Movie Quotes

Doug Benson shouldn't have quoted "Babe" on a recent date.

Tags: Doug Benson (29), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1283)

Posted: 03/04/04
Views: 5,381

Tess - Tub-a-Love

Big girls have to stick together.

Tags: Tess (8), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 10/25/01
Views: 1,227

Dom Irrera - Human Manatee

No one would want to roofie Louie Irrera.

Tags: Dom Irrera (9), sex (1283), men/women (1003)

Posted: 05/11/04
Views: 1,144

Vanessa Hollingshead - Curly Hair

If you want to feel better, give your miserable friends a call.

Tags: Vanessa Hollingshead (9), Comedy Central Presents (1821), sex (1283)

Posted: 02/26/04
Views: 1,337

 
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