Difference Between Men and Women | men/women | Jokes.com

Men/Women Jokes
Difference Between Men and Women
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1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want.

2. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

3. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

4. To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot & love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all.

5. Married men live longer than single men - but married men are a lot more willing to die.

6. Any married man should forget his mistakes - there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

7. Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

8. A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change & she does.

9. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

10. There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage & after marriage.

Filed Under: men/women (1718)
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Posted: 10/30/08

Greg Giraldo - 9/11 Bachelorettes

Greg explains how bachelorette parties prove that they'll never change the American way of life.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (41), men/women (1003), America (446)

Posted: 08/16/09
Views: 55,954

Greg Giraldo - Obama's Cigarettes

Barack Obama had to ask his wife's permission to run for president? Really?

Tags: Greg Giraldo (41), men/women (1003), Barack Obama (971)

Posted: 08/16/09
Views: 43,985

Lewis Black - Fan Mail Pt. 5

Lewis imagines eating Marie Antoinette.

Tags: Lewis Black (320), interview (2828), sex (1283)

Posted: 08/06/08
Views: 3,632

Greg Giraldo - Pride

Greg Giraldo highlights some of the positive aspects of the Puerto Rican Day parade.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (41), men/women (1003), ethnic (814)

Posted: 08/16/09
Views: 10,846

Patton Oswalt - Pioneer Births

Patton explains what pioneer women were dreaming of while giving birth in the wilderness.

Tags: Patton Oswalt (33), men/women (1003), kids (841)

Posted: 07/06/09
Views: 31,240

Hannibal Buress - Older Women

You can use a 47-year-old woman for a lot of stuff.

Tags: Hannibal Buress (2), men/women (1003), Live at Gotham (332)

Posted: 07/25/08
Views: 33,359

Nick DiPaolo - Marriage

Nick can't get used to his wife naming all his stuff.

Tags: Nick DiPaolo (61), Comedy Central Presents (1821), men/women (1003)

Posted: 01/18/07
Views: 5,973

Peter Berman - Low Expectations

Women need to lower their expectations.

Tags: Peter Berman (7), Comedy Central Presents (1821), men/women (1003)

Posted: 04/27/06
Views: 4,830

Sue Murphy - Guy Noise

Guys make strange noises when they look at beautiful women.

Tags: Sue Murphy (17), men/women (1003), The A-List (491)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 3,468

Leslie - Posse

Leslie breaks down the members of a lady posse.

Tags: Leslie (2), men/women (1003), Premium Blend (750)

Posted: 11/29/01
Views: 1,113

 
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