Dubya Quotes | George W. Bush | Jokes.com

George W. Bush Jokes
George W. Bush
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
...George W. Bush

"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
...Governor George W. Bush

"Welcome to Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts."
...Governor George W. Bush

"Mars is essentially in the same orbit...Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
...Governor George W. Bush, 8/11/94

"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."
...Governor George W. Bush, 9/15/95

"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy -- but that could change."
...Governor George W. Bush, 5/22/98

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'."
...Governor George W. Bush, 12/6/93

"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
...Governor George W. Bush, 11/30/96

"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future."
...Governor George W. Bush

"The future will be better tomorrow."
...Governor George W. Bush

"We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
...Governor George W. Bush 9/21/97

"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."
...Governor George W. Bush

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
...Governor George W. Bush to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93

"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."
...Governor George W. Bush

"Public speaking is very easy."
...Governor George W. Bush to reporters

"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican."
...Governor George W. Bush

"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
...Governor George W. Bush

"When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in LA, my answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame."
...George W. Bush

"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it."
...Governor George W. Bush 5/20/96

"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
...Governor George W. Bush 9/22/97

"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
...Governor George W. Bush, 9/5/93

"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
...Governor George W. Bush , 9/18/95

"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that George Bush may or may not make."
...Governor George W. Bush

"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made."
...Governor George W. Bush

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
...Governor George W. Bush

"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."
...Governor George W. Bush

Filed Under: news & politics (616),  George W. Bush (117)
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Posted: 10/30/08

Lewis Black - George W. Bush

When it comes to evolution, the jury's still out?

Tags: Lewis Black (320), George W. Bush (2037),

Posted: 12/03/08
Views: 34,128

Jim Hamilton - Can't Have Kids

Jim Hamilton explains why he can't have kids.

Tags: Jim Hamilton (2), George W. Bush (2037), sex (1283)

Posted: 12/15/05
Views: 373

Darryl Lenox - Lame Duck President

President George W. Bush knows it's over.

Tags: Darryl Lenox (3), George W. Bush (2037), Iraq (1073)

Posted: 08/10/06
Views: 522

Russ Meneve - More Love, Less War

Russ would be the worst POW.

Tags: Russ Meneve (16), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 04/07/05
Views: 1,241

Bill Burr - Rednecks

Rednecks are frightening people -- but you have to utilize them.

Tags: Bill Burr (27), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 02/13/03
Views: 6,120

Lizz Winstead - The War in Iraq

The Bush administration's policies behind the Iraq war annoy Lizz Winstead.

Tags: Lizz Winstead (14), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 10/07/04
Views: 629

Patrice O'Neal - Being American

Foreigners hate Americans because Americans don't know or care about other countries.

Tags: Patrice O'Neal (35), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 04/10/03
Views: 3,245

Patrice O'Neal - Hand on the Button

Patrice O'Neal thinks that President George W. Bush is crazy.

Tags: Patrice O'Neal (35), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 04/10/03
Views: 1,783

Greg Giraldo - Global Warming is Real

The Bush administration doesn't care about the environment.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (41), George W. Bush (2037), Comedy Central Presents (1821)

Posted: 04/01/04
Views: 473

 
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