Gary Lazer: Pet Parrot | Gary Lazer | Jokes.com

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Gary Lazer Jokes
Gary Lazer: Pet Parrot
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I got a parrot; it turned on me. You don't realize how strong those birds are, but I was walking by its cage one day -- boom! -- the next thing you know, I'm in a chair,; I'm all tied up; I have a gag in my mouth. And the parrot's sitting in front of me going, 'Now you repeat after me: Hello, hello, who's the pretty boy now, huh?'
More Gary Lazer Jokes »
See Gary Lazer Tell It » Gary Lazer - Missing New York If you're going to live in New York, you may consider buying a guard dog or parrot.
Filed Under: animals (978),  Gary Lazer (7)
Posted: 02/24/92

Gary Lazer - Missing New York

If you're going to live in New York, you may consider buying a guard dog or parrot.

Tags: Gary Lazer (4), animals (540), The A-List (486)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 568

Gary Lazer - Smokers and Nonsmokers

There's going to be a civil war, and you know the nonsmokers are going to win.

Tags: Gary Lazer (4), The A-List (486), observational (364)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 1,172

Gary Lazer - Getting Sucked out of a Plane

It's scary to sit by those hatches that can pop open at any moment.

Tags: Gary Lazer (4), The A-List (486), flying (196)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 595

Gary Lazer - A Grim Future

People know they're destroying the Earth.

Tags: Gary Lazer (4), sex (1202), food (719)

Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 273

Mitch Hedberg - Cincinnati Tribute

The Mitch Across America comics tell their favorite Mitch Hedberg jokes.

Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), animals (540),

Posted: 09/30/08
Views: 13,303

Greg Giraldo - DVD Exclusive - Marsupial Sex

Given the choice of kangaroo sex and koala sex, you'd probably be wise to go with the koala sex.

Tags: Greg Giraldo (67), sex (1202), animals (540)

Posted: 10/14/09
Views: 24,117

DVD Exclusive - Wyatt Cenac - Animals

Wyatt Cenac has a few issues with PETA's animal rights analogies.

Tags: Wyatt Cenac (8), animals (540), exclusives (335)

Posted: 08/16/11
Views: 7,984

My Car the Bus

Morgan Murphy's first car was not a bus, it was the bus.

Tags: sex (1202), men/women (1155)

Posted: 04/03/12
Views: 0

Lewis Black - Fan Mail Pt. 3

Lewis discusses the military.

Tags: Lewis Black (44), animals (540), exclusives (335)

Posted: 08/04/08
Views: 18,035

Exclusive - Sheng Wang - Summer of Sheng

Summer in New York City smells like garbage just got out of yoga class.

Tags: Sheng Wang (18), animals (540), New York City (352)

Posted: 07/13/11
Views: 8,108