Mitch Hedberg Jokes
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Mitch Hedberg: Instant Oatmeal
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I get up in the
morning, I make myself a bowl of instant oatmeal, and then I don't do anything for an hour, which makes me wonder why I need the instant oatmeal. I could get the regular oatmeal and feel productive.
Mitch Hedberg - Party of Two
People are selfish.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), food (804), Shorties Watchin' Shorties (149)
Posted: 05/18/04
Views: 13,764
Mitch Hedberg - Blocking the Fire Exit
If you're flammable and have legs, you're never blocking a fire exit.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), Comedy Central Presents (1821), food (804)
Posted: 01/04/99
Views: 44,310
Mitch Hedberg - Baked Potatoes
Mitch Hedberg likes to eat.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), Comedy Central Presents (1821), food (804)
Posted: 01/04/99
Views: 11,454
Mitch Hedberg - Instant Oatmeal
Making instant oatmeal feels unproductive.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), food (804), Premium Blend (750)
Posted: 05/22/98
Views: 11,650
Mitch Hedberg - Sandwiches
Ducks eat for free at Subway.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), food (804), animals (791)
Posted: 11/03/04
Views: 3,857
Mitch Hedberg - Flossing
It's as hard to quit smoking as it is to start flossing.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), Comedy Central Presents (1821), health (976)
Posted: 01/04/99
Views: 11,567
Mitch Hedberg - Turtlenecks
Wearing a turtleneck is like getting strangled by a really weak guy all day.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), Comedy Central Presents (1821), food (804)
Posted: 01/04/99
Views: 15,827
Mitch Hedberg - Inspirational Yogurt
Mitch Hedberg is inspired by his yogurt.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), food (804), Premium Blend (750)
Posted: 05/22/98
Views: 12,479
Mitch Hedberg - Radio Show
Mitch, Lewis and Dave discuss the 2004 election in Austin, TX.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), Indecision (1359), Dave Attell (61)
Posted: 09/08/08
Views: 65,780
Mitch Hedberg - Fan Mail
Mitch and Dave read a fan letter.
Tags: Mitch Hedberg (19), school (258), smoking (126)
Posted: 09/08/08
Views: 5,911
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