Dana Gould Jokes
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Dana Gould: Uncomfortable in Restaurants
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I feel very uncomfortable when
I eat in restaurants. I'm obnoxiously polite with the waiters: 'I just want a tuna sandwich. I'll go get it. You sit here -- I'll get it, I'll make it.'
Dana Gould - The Afterlife
You'd feel like a moron if you got to Hell, and it was exactly what everyone says it is.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), food (804), imitations (772)
Posted: 12/21/98
Views: 1,728
Dana Gould - Eating Out With the Family
If anyone spills anything, Dad will stick a fork right in your eyeball.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (841), food (804)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 572
Dana Gould - Reasoning with Children
The minute that you think your kids have reason, they're the worst people in the world.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (841), Live at Gotham (332)
Posted: 07/12/07
Views: 1,766
Dana Gould - L.A. Liberalism
People in L.A. are liberal, but only about certain things.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), kids (841), marriage (581)
Posted: 07/12/07
Views: 456
Dana Gould - Worse Jobs
There are worse jobs than rodeo clown.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), work/office (398), death (318)
Posted: 12/21/98
Views: 331
Dana Gould - Break-Up
Dana went shopping after his girlfriend broke up with him.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), dating (656), The A-List (491)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 984
Dana Gould - Synchronized Lunatics
There might be another crazy guy 30 miles away responding to what that lunatic is saying.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), alcohol (496), The A-List (491)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 852
Dana Gould - Purgatory
Death is gonna suck.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), work/office (398), death (318)
Posted: 12/21/98
Views: 337
Dana Gould - Alien Abductions
It's always the same type of people who get abducted by aliens.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), ethnic (814), stereotypes (431)
Posted: 05/11/04
Views: 1,188
Dana Gould - Girlfriend Moving Out
She'll leave you with just your toaster and a fork.
Tags: Dana Gould (16), men/women (1003), dating (656)
Posted: 02/24/92
Views: 434
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