Get in Line | flying | Jokes.com

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Flying Jokes
flying
A crowded flight is cancelled, and a frazzled agent must rebook a long line of inconvenienced travelers by herself. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushes to the front and demands to be on the next flight, first class.

The agent replies, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first."

The passenger screams, "Do you have ANY idea who I am?"

The gate agent grabs her public address microphone, "May I have your attention, please? We have a passenger here WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to gate 17."

The man grits his teeth, "Screw you."

She replies, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that, too."
Filed Under: insults (1736),  flying (107)
Posted: 12/01/08

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Rich fixes the coffee pot.

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Blake Clark - Airplane Seatbelt

They explain how a seatbelt works on airplanes.

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Michael Ian Black - Strangers Don't Find Me Funny

Michael Ian Black finds opportune moments to be hilarious.

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John Mendoza - Kids Suck

John hates kids.

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Rob Riggle - Riff Raff Airlines

Penicillin cannot touch Long Island riff raff.

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Rob Riggle - Magic Tale of the Double Down Beer

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Uncensored - Louis C.K. - The Miracle of Flight

You can't complain about something that you didn't even know existed 30 seconds ago.

Tags: Louis C.K. (31), impressions (466), travel (301)

Posted: 01/01/11
Views: 33,990