Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word fuck. It is the one magical word, which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, fuck falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive (Mary fucked John) and intransitive (John was fucked by Mary). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck). It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (John is ugly, fuck, he's also stupid). As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word fuck.
Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations:
1) Surprise -- What the fuck are you doing here?
2) Fraud -- I got fucked by the car dealer.
3) Resignation -- Oh, fuck it!
4) Trouble -- I guess I'm fucked now.
5) Aggression -- FUCK YOU!
6) Disgust -- Fuck me.
7) Confusion -- What the fuck...?
8) Difficulty -- I don't understand this fucking business!
9) Despair -- Fucked again....
10) Pleasure -- I fucking couldn't be happier.
11) Displeasure -- What the fuck is going on here?
12) Lost -- Where the fuck are we?
13) Disbelief -- UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE!
14) Retaliation -- Up your fucking ass!
15) Denial -- I didn't fucking do it.
16) Perplexity -- I know fuck-all about it.
17) Apathy -- Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?
18) Greetings -- How the fuck are ya?
19) Suspicion -- Who the fuck are you?
20) Panic -- Let's get the fuck out of here.
21) Directions -- Fuck off.
22) Awe -- How the fuck did you do that?
It can be used in an anatomical description -- He's a fucking asshole. It can be used to tell time -- It's five fucking thirty. It can be used in business -- How did I wind up with this fucking job? It can be maternal -- Motherfucker. It can be political -- Fuck Clinton!
It has also been used by many notable people throughout history:
What the fuck was that? -- Mayor of Hiroshima
Where did all these fucking Indians come from? -- General Custer
That's not a real fucking gun, is it? -- John Lennon
Who's gonna fucking find out? -- Richard Nixon
Why the fuck did that apple hit me? -- Issac Newton
Heads are going to fucking roll. -- Marie Antoinette
I could have used a fucking map. -- Ulysses
Where the fuck is all this water coming from? -- Captain of the Titanic
Any fucking idiot could understand that. -- Albert Einstein
It DOES SO fucking look like her! -- Picasso
Okay, I know... we'll build this BIG fucking wall to keep them out. -- Emperor of the Ch'in Dynasty
I can't believe I just fucking said that. -- Patrick Henry
Fucking backstabbers! -- Julius Caesar
You want what on the fucking ceiling? -- Michelangelo
Fellatio is not fucking! -- Bill Clinton
Where is that fucking pizza guy? -- Elvis
Why? Because its fucking there! -- Sir Edmund Hilary
I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain? -- Joan of Arc
Scattered fucking showers my ass. -- Noah
I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head. -- John F. Kennedy
What are the fucking chances I'm going to heaven? -- Adolf Hitler
Hey, where the fuck are your turbans? -- Christopher Columbus when he discovered the Indians.
Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy is now available at the Comedy Central Shop.