-- You learned to swim about the same time "Jaws" came out and still can't swim naked at night.
-- Prince's "1999" was the focal point of your plans for an end of the century party.
-- You dressed to emulate either Duran Duran, Poison, Madonna, Rick Springfield or Cyndi Lauper.
-- You wanted to be gagged with a spoon.
-- You had a poster of Bo, Luke & Daisy Duke.
-- There was nothing questionable about Bert and Ernie living together.
-- You dialed "867-5309" to see if Jenny would answer.
-- Your family's cable TV box had the three rows of numbers, and you had to move the selector switch accordingly.
Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy is now available at the Comedy Central Shop.