1: You tell them that you went to the museum, saw dinosaur bones, and thought of them.
2: For their birthday, you offer to help them blow out the candles.
3: On their birthday, you tell the fire department that if they see a large fire, don't water it down, because soggy cake is no good.
4: Explain to them that the reason that no one can see the Christmas tree is because you put on every ornament that they got in their life.
5: Ask them if they got Columbus' autograph.
6: Tell them that the reason that they got no birthday gifts was that everyone had to pitch in to buy the candles.
7: Ask them if the Disney hit Hercules is telling the truth.
8: Ask them in what order God REALLY made the Earth.
9: Ask them if they helped God write the Bible.
10: Ask them if they personally knew Adam and Eve.
Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy is now available at the Comedy Central Shop.