A farmer buys a rooster to service his 200 hens. When he gets the rooster into the barnyard, he tells him, "Randy, I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Have fun, but take your time."
The farmer points him toward the henhouse and the rooster takes off like a shot.
WHAM! Randy nails every hen in the henhouse, three or four times. Randy runs out and sees a flock of geese down by the lake. WHAM! He nails all the geese. Randy runs to the pigpen, the cow pasture -- soon, he's been on every animal on the farm.
The farmer is distraught, worried that his expensive rooster won't even last the day.
Sure enough, the farmer wakes up the next morning to find Randy laid out flat in the middle of the yard, buzzards circling overhead.
The sad farmer shakes his head and says, "Oh, Randy, I told you to pace yourself."
Randy opens one eye, winks, and nods towards the sky, "Shhh, they're getting closer."
Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy is now available at the Comedy Central Shop.